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When I see beautiful people, I feel sorry for them. Beautiful people have so much further to fall, so much more disappointment to feel, when at last the final glow fades from their cheeks and that sparkle dies in their eyes. When their lovers look upon them with no surprise, no thrill. When every kiss tastes of ashes and every touch burns, when every word falls on their hearts like a knife and in their bellies like a sickness. When I pass the elderly on the street, I see a companion. Fifty years older than me, yes. But I have been there. I know them. When I see the young, I feel lost. What is there in the world that could cause anyone, anywhere, to laugh like that? What is there in the world which could cause anyone, anywhere, to care so damn much? I see the happiness and the abandon, and I remember my own as if I only read about it in a story or watched it in a film. None of that really happened to me. I never loved like that. I was never touched like that. I never felt that. I. At the same time I realized I was not at all getting any sexual pleasure out of copulation, rather it seemed to be an exercise to achieve something. Days went by and I did not even realize that another year was gone! I was 28 years by then. I remained so depressed all day and had a real hard time. Then one day Rajesh told me that he has decided to go to a male gynecologist who is an expert in infertility cases in the city again. I was really very rigid about not going to the male gynecologist out of my shyness. I think any normal lady would avoid that because the fact remains you have to expose your breasts and pussy in front of a male, may it be for examination purpose. So I was really rigid on my stand about avoiding a male doctor and before this could land up in a harsh confrontation between my husband and me, one of my neighbors, Meera, had a proposal to my mother-in-law. If I can quote my neighbor's words to my mother-in-law, "Aunty-ji, you have tried so many doctors for Anita,.
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